Try as you might, sometimes things you were actively working to avoid still happen. So what do you do? Crumble under the pressure? Give up because you think you failed? Do you reassess what you did so that you can do it differently next time – always working toward improving? Or do you accept that sometimes, things that you don’t want to happen, still happen?
Here’s the thing – we only have control over the actions we take and how we feel about anything and everything that we do or that happens to us. That’s it. We have no control over what others say, we have no control over what others do, we have no control over many things. Not directly. So, accept the fall. Get up. Helps others get up and keep moving forward.
In order for my grandmother to be happy, she still needs freedom. With that freedom comes times when she may fall. We have cameras in the rooms she sits in the most, including her bedroom, so we can monitor her. But we can’t be everywhere. One day, my grandmother was in her room fiddling with her clothes (she loves organizing and folding things) and she lost her balance and fell. Her room is not carpeted so there is a smooth surface. She was wearing sturdy shoes – not slippers – so she should have been secure. She was not startled and did not get up suddenly to result in her getting light-headed. Yet, she lost her balance and fell. We immediately rushed in and helped her up. She was not hurt at all. Thankfully the flooring we put down is the cushiony flooring folks put in kids’ rooms. But I couldn’t beat myself up over it. My husband and I took all of the precautions we could to keep my grandmother safe and she still fell. My lesson? To keep working on finding the right balance of freedom for her while still having some control over her surroundings so that she can remain safe. And accept that as diligent as I try to be, sometimes the things I was trying to avoid from happening, still happen.
We can’t be afraid to take risk. We can’t be afraid to let people live their lives. All we can do is our best. Our best to help others. Our best to improve ourselves. Our best to teach others how to improve. Our best to accept that “perfect” is not what we think “perfect” is supposed to be or feel. Perfect lives have falls. They are flawed. How we accept the falls and how we learn from them is what makes our lives perfect.
What do you do after you fall?